Well, Gay Pride is back in the city this week, meaning that sin will be on parade down Fifth Avenue. Not just general sin, but very specifically Pride. 
I was staring at my "Seven Deadly Sins" shower curtain and considered how unfair it is that Pride gets a gay parade, yet the other sins are woefully neglected. In the name of equality, couldn't all of the sins get their very own gay parade? Seven sins and seven days of the week? Homos love synergy!
MONDAY! Gay Pride - Start the week with the traditional, "I'm okay, you're okay, but what's her problem."
TUEDAY! Gay Envy - Geffen as Grand Marshall while a bunch of working class mo's try to figure out if what Geffen's wearing is available at Century 21.
WEDNESDAY! Gay Gluttony - Power-bottom, crystal pig-sluts Unite! This one can be a masquerade parade as all will be anonymous, as in Alcoholics Anonymous, Cocaine Anonymous, Sexual Cumpulsives Anonymous.
THURSDAY! Gay Lust - Just cover Fifth Avenue with black plastic, lube it up and let the fun begin. Sponsored by Wet!
FRIDAY! Gay Anger - We're some of the best protesters out there. Bring out the signs, the banners, and, oh yeah, the whistles. Must have the whistles!
SATURDAY! Gay Covetousness - This one doesn't need to go all the way down Fifth. Gucci, Fendi, etc. provide all this day's parade needs.
SUNDAY! Gay Sloth - All that parading around makes you just want to order brunch in. Even the biggest mythological gay of all rested on his seventh day.
