Manhattan Offender

Camera karma, part one

May 30:  Planning to start writing again, Canon Elph SD200, basic, but really small and not overly pixeled. 

June 11:  Camera dropped at company event for Mister Offender by one of his coworkers.  Top button falls out, broken.

June 15:  Mister Offender's company replaces camera.  (My man works for a generous company.  I wonder what that's like.)

July 10:  New camera lost on way back from the Pines.  Xanax to blame, but I still was able to navigate us home.  (And no, I was not driving.)

July 12:  Original camera brought in for repair to PhotoTech. 

July 21:  Camera retrieved.  $60 for repair.  $75 for new memory card.

July 23:  Camera dropped at P.S.1 in bathroom, taking this shot.

July 26:  "Yes, I was just here.  It was dropped.  Again"

July 27:  Estimate for newest repair:  $185.

July 27:  Begin shopping for third camera.

Weekend wills and won'ts

Friday night - Will:  Go out with coworkers and get tipsy in Madison Square Park.  Won't:  See Last Tango in Paris at American Museum of the Moving Image.  Not that I don't want to see it, but our small team is getting bigger by one person next week, and none of us were involved in the hiring decision.  Shivers.

Saturday - Will:  Spend at least four hours on personal appearance.  Gym.  Hair.  Face.  P.S.1.  Attend party of a friend of a friend who is supposed to be an amazing artist.  I've never seen her speak.  Mostly just nods her head.  Not sure what her deal is.  Won't:  David Matthews Band at Randall's Island.  I'm proud to say I don't know any of their songs.  I just know that they are very popular amongst people that dislike me.  That and Blow and the Hootie-fish.

Sunday - Will:  Fire Island (Pines).  The regular.  Maybe no Xanax this time.  Won't:  SummerStage.  Just not an appealing line up this year.  It wasn't many summers past that SummerStage would keep me from the beach.  This year is, well, dated.  Only appeal was Brazilian Girls, and that has past.

Lies my Gawker told me

The Times is just too heavy, too unwieldy to carry along for a subway commute.  And my commute is too short to really delve into it.  But a random neuron reminded me of repeatedly reading how gay the Thursday Styles section is, so I handed over my dollar, atwitter with gay expection.

Imagine my flacidity upon finding these compelling articles (wearable computers?, plus-size workout wear?)  Not one iota of gay.  Did Gawker lie to me?  Again, it was a random neuron, so I checked back and was reminded that the section decreased in homosexiness over time.  Maybe it is backlash.  Did the little gay flower of the Times wilt under the intense UV rays of Gawker? 

Regardless, I won't be carrying this two pound albatross around next Thursday, unless, of course, Gawker tells me to.

Hot

Partly Cloudy 96°F Feels Like 106°F

Nothing further to add.

But this cooled me off.  Big time.

Conservatives up late looking for hot gay action

Offender has never been a fan of blogs blogging about blogs, but poking fun at a Supreme Court nominee has made such introversion interesting.  After making a hastily-written joke about the background of John G. Roberts and being linked by a Wonkette post doing the same, Manhattan Offender was one of the top read blogs in the world.  Well, one of the top read blogs ... on a Saturday night ... read mostly by right wing conservative christians.  Not really the crowd I ever considered as an audience.

The details are recapped by Wonkette, and even better by Wikipedia.  Suddenly a significant number of links to this site are from mini-pundits, mostly conservative. 

This provided a chance to look at site traffic and a little insight.  Based solely on links to the original post, one thing is overwhelmingly apparent:  Conservatives blog readers are night owls and have lots of internet time on the weekends.  While links from more moderate and liberal sources died down during the weekend and especially on weekend nights, the in-bound links from conservative sites just kept coming through.

Conclusion:  They are up late on weekend nights and full of energy which makes sense in light of today's big news.

At last, something to terrorize me

Here's a summary from nypost.com:

Osama bin Laden tried to buy a massive amount of cocaine, spike it with poison and sell it in the United States, hoping to kill thousands of Americans one year after the 9/11 attacks, The Post has learned.

Sources said the feds were told that bin Laden personally met with leaders of a Colombian drug cartel.

The drug lords turned him down, as it would be bad for business in the long term.  But it would probably wipe out more of Manhattan than any random subway bomb.  I would have, maybe two friends left alive.  And they're not much fun anyway.

7-11, gone to heaven?

Knowing that I need the biggest bottle of water to get through the day (as my office water has visible 'stuff' in it), I stop by 7-11 in the hopes that they carry acceptably gay water (Volvic or Fiji).  Shock of shocks, there is a large yellow sign:  WE ARE CLOSED.  Below it, another sign explaining that the store will be closed untill at least Thursday while they are updating store systems.  What store systems are so complex that it requires the entire store to be closed?  Maybe I'll call this guy.  One can only hope that this involves installing a "Diet Coke Slurpee" or, dream of dreams, a "Tab Slurpee".

(I took phone-photos of the sign, but alas the cell phone hasn't reached my email yet!  Damn you, Cingular!)

UPDATE: Apparently the 'systems' that are being worked on are air conditioning systems. Yes, 7-11 is hot, hot, hot. And will soon be cool! And if I never did receive the picture from my phone. Any volunteers to help me figure out what I'm doing wrong?

When logos attack

Warm Up, the popular, almost decade-old event at PS1 always pulls a fantastic crowd, looking to dance to great music.  Saturday's set started with a tight set by Darshan Jesrani and featured MU, the collaboration of Maurice Fulton and Mutsumi Kanamori.  Kanamori's set took a while to get the crowd on her side, but after she had won them over, Fulton spun an amazing set.

The biggest change in Warm Up over the years has been the increasingly pervading corporate logos.  It's fantastic that they are able to team with Nikon and Target.  Nikon has a discreet booth off to the side.  Target is a little more, um, invasive.  Early on they started with red and white beach balls emblazoned with the Target logo being dropped from the P.S.1 roof.  Good enough fun, but rather distracting when what you are there to do is dance. 

When the beach balls ran dry (mostly deflated and pocketed over time), the next aerial assault happened.  Foam-filled zippered nylon red discs came down.  Possibly they were meant to be frisbees, but a suspicious mind thinks they were actually supposed to be used as seat cushions.  These flew nicely in the air, but were a jolt to the system if they hit you.  (And the zippers were particularly harsh on the face.)

It was not long ago that a corporate sponsorship meant a mention on the website, a banner or twelve, or a mention in the program.  More and more, sponsors chose to impregnate events making sure that "maximum consumer visual impact is achieved". 

Dancing is about moving to music, feeling the crowd and getting down.  If arms are raised in the air it should be out of joy, not self defense.

Maybe napkins would be more effective?

Package checks on the subway? Here?!?

My assistant just told me of her shock that there will be package checks now on subway platforms.  Granted, she should be working on that crucial "getting a better price for Pelligrino for the office refrigerator" project, but she is right.  This is a logistical nightmare in the works.  And can you imagine the other stuff that they will find while looking for these bombs?  (Personally, I'm going to be getting clothes with more pockets.)

It is only fair that the police will be checking our packages though.  I've been checking theirs for years.

Photo from here.

Word of the day

Thanks, Google home page.  That pretty much sums it up.