Manhattan Offender

Past, Over: The Jewel

Upon review of these Past, Over columns one could surmise the author is a bit of a sex fiend.  Or at least was.  Not to assuage these thoughts in any way, this week's bit visits the old Jewel Theater.  What it wont tell you is that it is the place where I first met a guy that I actually would spend the night with, who would become my first boyfriend, and who, according to the Cuban government that expelled him during the Mariella boatlift, was insane.  Enjoy.

Rich Wrangler

Do you enjoy train wrecks?  Then you'll love Rich Wrangler.  This is 100% NOT SAFE FOR WORK, even if you work at a porn production palace.  As a brief synopsis:   [descriptive adjective redacted per Wrangler's request] 40-something rides in his jeep wearing naught but short-shorts, impales himself on the jeep's stick shift, and ... just watch.  (And don't forget to note the use of establishing, middle and close-up shots.  This is community college cinematography class sexcellence.

Commenter blossoms/devolves

Frequent commenter Alex has started a blog of his own, making the frequent bloggeur mistake of announcing it with only two posts up.  Check it out.

Emo kid.

The Everything Test

There are many different types of tests on the internet today. Personality tests, purity tests, stereotype tests, political tests. But now, there is one test to rule them all.

Traditionally, online tests would ask certain questions about your musical tastes or clothing for a stereotype, your experiences for a purity test, or deep questions for a personality test.We're turning that upside down - all the questions affect all the results, and we've got some innovative results too! Enjoy :-)

Personality You are more emotional than logical, more concerned about others than concerned about self, more atheist than religious, more dependent than loner, more lazy than workaholic, more traditional than rebel, more artistic mind than engineering mind, more cynical than idealist, more leader than follower, and more extroverted than introverted. As for specific personality traits, you are outgoing (100%), romantic (86%), slutty (85%), adventurous (75%).

Stereotypes Emo Kid 89% Old Geezer 83% Punk Rock 80%

Life Experience Sex 73% Substances 78% Travel 32%

Politics Your political views would best be described as Socialist, whom you agree with around 78% of the time.

Socioeconomic Your attitude toward life best associates you with . You make more than 94% of those who have taken this test, and 38% more than the U.S. average.

If your life was a movie, it would be rated NC-17. By the way, your hottness rank is 79%, hotter than 96% of other test takers.

TAKE THE TEST
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Yikes.

Poor neglected website.  Here's a scattershot post.

This week's And the Brand Played On had me zeroing in on "Fag Hags" of the Blue Whale which was a complete and total blast.  I now have a technique to listening in on people if I don't have a notepad handy.  By repeating verbatim what is just heard into the voice recorder of my cell phone all is pretty effectively captured.

Double-dipping, Past, Over is all about the Pride.  It's easy to hate on Pride.  It's hokey, odd, and outfield.  Which is why I will still go to the parade and give my support.  Only eight years ago my sexuality was still disclosed from my parents.  Granted they had already figured it out years before, but it was great blossoming for me.  Pretty much a self-actualized gay at this point, I see it as a responsibility to lend my support to both my predecessors and to communities that are still emerging. 

Stepping off the soapbox to dish some Fire Island dirt:

• Pavilion on Fire Island still is incomplete.  Apparently they filed permits as a renovation and not as a reconstruction and therefore are now being denied a certificate of occupancy.  The government official needed to fix the problem will not even come to the area until sometime in late June.
• The Meatrack path between Cherry Grove and the Pines was perfectly painted in a vibrant orange paint.  The painters hit every toe-stubbing stump and thorny vine.  Unfortunately though, the rains of last week pretty much washed the paint away, leaving only a slight orange tint on the path and problem area.
• Every member of my house to date has seen me naked.  Oops.

Other randomness:

• For the first time in my life, I've hired a housekeeper.  While out on the island last weekend, she came in and caught up all of the cleaning that was neglected during the three months of illness.  Perhaps the best present ever given to myself.
• Sybil the cat is doing great, but I'm wondering if I'm a good father.  Abandoned two weekends in a row (one of the neighbor's kids feeds and plays with her - a bargain at $20!) she is now much more affectionate and runs to the door when I come home.  Also, my own eating disorder might be passed along to her.  After having two cats die two years ago, one from diabetes, keeping her slim and healthy is important to me.  Every day she plays fetch for a good half hour, running through rooms to get the thrown toy.  At the end of these sessions, she vigorously pants, something I've not seen a cat do before.  Similarly, her quantity of food hasn't increased in her two months with me, but she has grown substantially.  Maybe I'll buy her a little scale that measures body fat and rewards her with a treat for BMI of 13 per cent or below.  Video soon.

WYSIWYG Talent Show

Thanks to those that came out to see the show.  It was nice to meet both old and new faces!  For you that missed it, here's my portion of last night's WYSIWYG Talent Show.

WYSIWYG

Reminding!
WYSIWYG!
Wednesday!
7 PM!
Be there!
I have something very special planned.

New thing: And the Brand Played On

There's a new column that I'm writing at Gawker:  And the Brand Played On.  Think Jane Goodall meets Bret Easton Ellis.  Essentially I'll be writing down or recording conversations that I hear on Fire Island over the summer and reporting it back.  Hope you like!

Some weekend pictures

   

Granted the good ones can't be shown.  (Like the one of the naked friend eating mayo out of the jar in front of the house.)  And the best ones were never taken.  (Like all of us deciding that the weather was too nice for clothes and taking a nude stroll on the boardwalk at three in the morning.)

It's going to be a good summer.

As a man who is, on occasion, over the world, I am intrigued

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